You know what would solve all this?

Allow priests to marry, and allow women to be priests. Get rid of all the weird shit. Celibacy can be construed to mean whatever the heck they want.

Somehow in my mind a "universal" church shouldn't be dominated by men.

I had a psychology professor that was a friar, and he dropped out of the church less than a month after my last class with him. Found a lady friend. Great teacher too. Was extremely happy for him.

Obviously the Vatican has lost the script, or possibly never had it to begin with. Talk about something that could be built back better. Actually, just scrapping the whole thing would probably be best.