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1
You deserve to lose your money at this point (www.ladbible.com)
posted 1 year ago by ReturnOfShillSlayer 1 year ago by ReturnOfShillSlayer +5 / -4
Pastor Says Jesus Hasn't Returned Because People Haven't Donated Enough Cash
He told viewers if they donated more cash they could 'speed up' Jesus' return
www.ladbible.com
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▲ 4 ▼
– Jamezelo 4 points 1 year ago +4 / -0

There's a song those ICP guys made back in the 90's about these kind of snake oil salesmen using God as their salespitch.

The second verse goes... .

God had called me and then stopped by

And he told me you're gonna die

Unless you buy my holy water

Check, cash, or a money order

This is true, don't question me

I'll even send you shit for free

It's only ten bucks for the call

And I'll send a prayer, no charge at all

Put your lips up to the screen

Close your eyelids and intervene

Your lips to mine, now send the cash

And while you're there, you can kiss my ass

Take your paycheck and send me half

And I'll send you God's autograph

I'll get Allah's and Buddha's too

Even Zeus, I don't give a fuck who

Just send me that money

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▲ 3 ▼
– Jamezelo 3 points 1 year ago +3 / -0

Infact this is the intro lol

*"Give God the first portion of your income, say that with me,

Give God the first portion of your income. Give it first!

Not after deducts, not after the social security and the hospitilization, and the malnutrition.

Not after all these things on your check you say

I'm gonna give God a little what's left.

You do, and that's what you gonna get from God."

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▲ 2 ▼
– Jalapeno_gringo 2 points 1 year ago +2 / -0

2 Corinthians 9:6-7

  1. The point is this: whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows bountifully[a] will also reap bountifully. 7. Each one must give as he has decided in his heart, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.

We are not compelled. I did not take an oath of TITHE. It is a manipulation of the scriptures to extract money and nothing more

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▲ 2 ▼
– Jalapeno_gringo 2 points 1 year ago +2 / -0

Suicidal Tendencies did "Send me your money". Another good one

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▲ 0 ▼
– Merely_a_conduit 0 points 1 year ago +2 / -2

Your father looks disoriented.

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▲ 2 ▼
– Jalapeno_gringo 2 points 1 year ago +2 / -0

No need to hurl insults when we both know that pastor is a crook

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▲ 1 ▼
– Merely_a_conduit 1 point 1 year ago +1 / -0

Have you ever wondered what drives people to "churches" like that? Do you know who Martin Luther was? He formed the Lutheran Church after the Catholic Church was selling "indulgences" which were like buying a ticket to heaven in that fucked up bastardization of the teachings of Jesus Christ. I have no doubt there's innocent victims amongst his parishioners who have given money in good faith but I believe there's also a large portion who just want him to take their money so they don't have to confront the lives they led. A lot of people are running from themselves in the form of busy work or "grinding" this guy just gave them a box to stuff cash into to absolve them of their shitty actions. Food for thought but I do know a clear conscience is worth more than gold.

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▲ 2 ▼
– Jalapeno_gringo 2 points 1 year ago +2 / -0

They are being deceived and the pastor should be called out for his transgression

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▲ 1 ▼
– Merely_a_conduit 1 point 1 year ago +1 / -0

The man should be raped in the street by maniacal hobos but Judge not lest ye be judged

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▲ 2 ▼
– Jalapeno_gringo 2 points 1 year ago +2 / -0

He has a worse fate than that awaiting him if he doesn't repent

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