I don't even know if I trust my own eyes

Knowledge implies perceivable; trust represents ones consent to suggested. The former needs to be let go; while the latter tempts one to hold onto.

Grab a tennis-ball and go to bed...you think you can hold onto it throughout your sleep? If you can't even hold onto a tennis-ball; then why all the mental gymnastics to hold onto trusted beliefs?

What one perceives inspires one to adapt, yet one cannot hold onto inspiration. Choosing to resist the want to hold onto that which one needs to let go...that's adaptation.