He's remembering how his trip to space wasn't positive at all. It destroyed his life and turned him to drug abuse and alcoholism. Almost like it was all just a bad, psychosis induced dream...
There's no way to prove it, but I think many or all of the Apollo astronauts came to "believe" it, or whatever you might call the psychosis that removes conscious awareness of being part of a great deception.
Similarly, Thomas Jefferson carefully avoided taking credit for the Declaration of Independence for about 25 years. After that, we could surmise that it was much easier all around if he just "believed" he wrote it.
He's remembering how his trip to space wasn't positive at all. It destroyed his life and turned him to drug abuse and alcoholism. Almost like it was all just a bad, psychosis induced dream...
There's no way to prove it, but I think many or all of the Apollo astronauts came to "believe" it, or whatever you might call the psychosis that removes conscious awareness of being part of a great deception.
Similarly, Thomas Jefferson carefully avoided taking credit for the Declaration of Independence for about 25 years. After that, we could surmise that it was much easier all around if he just "believed" he wrote it.
Interesting idea...