Crops, melonfarmer! Do you have them?
Can't even eat without crops!
Also shooting freely of all the beasts of the earth and fishes of the sea.
This place could be a buffet table tomorrow, if every department had a supervisor with a shotgun!
Are they real?
Sadly, yes. Many people do have personalities.
This is one of those things that cannot be helped.
All of the current digital online social media platform are outdated and terrible.
WELL YOU'RE NOT WRONG.
without any kind of success
It seems to be making investors quite wealthy. They'd probably rate that as a kind of success. And they've fortified themselves against the complaints of the end-users by not caring.
all the platform from both the East and West
But you forgot about mine: Footbook, the anti-social network, which I founded in 2012 to several applause and one (1) fanfare, and has risen to dominate the antisocial networking space through a combination of ruthless lack of competition and also by sending packs of guys with machetes after our competitors.
To get a Footbook account of your very own, fill out your profile data onto an A4 sheet of paper, then go bury it in your backyard and never tell anyone.
as an outsider
They'll blame him, but they'll blame me, but most importantly they'll blame him.
on my mind
Yeah but your head don't have port 80 open.
Gonna have to put that shit on a webserver, son!
I am living in a 3rd world country
Dude, same! Third world best world; global south number one forever!
People hate it when I say this shit, but at the end of the day it really doesn't matter how gross your domestic product may be, or how many conscripts you can browbeat into your press-gang. It's just not possible to legislate a nation-state into a condition of quality, and quality is the one thing we have down here in spades.
But as I believe most strongly in fairness, I will give the north two things: They've got bears, which are pretty nice, and they've got Tennessee, and those are things nobody can take away from them.
do not want waste my time, my energy
My magic 8-ball told me that signs point towards you not going to be willing to be nearly as judicious in the use of other peoples' time and energy.
Anyway, I don't think my time will be compatible since it goes backwards, and all of my energy has recently been invested into a secretive cult working to exterminate the colour orange - which I don't care about but the return rate was phenomenal. "BIG STONKS" as the youths say.
“pay as you will” marketplace
Sounds slightly better than the in-use "pay as you are" marketplace.
Which means that when cost of fabrication, packaging, and shipping are added in, together with the overheads, that it's not going to provide a positive return to the bank-account's bottom line.
That's your problem. You're looking for investors when what you want is adventure capitalists.
With all of my terrible personal experience so far
With mine, I'm writing you a forum post.
Ain't I just such a stand-up sort of fella?
$8600 USD
Let's say around $80 a month for hosting (that's 8-12 GB RAM, 4-6 dedicated compute cores, and around 5 TB monthy transfer from most typical providers) so $960 for the first year.
Likely, being some manner of deity or bodhisattva or something you don't actually need upkeep outside of renting an internet connection and powering a laptop. I pay about $60/mo for a 200GB symmetric connection, so let's say $800 for a year's internet, and an equal amount in electricity bill.
You sell the idea as if its pretty much well-baked so we assume that you've got code ready for deployment and that we're four months away from an alpha-state at the very least. That gives 8 months to get a release candidate.
We'll throw in $140 for light snacks because even the most enlightened of us enjoy the occasional packet of chips.
So where's the other 6 grand going?
new platform will take a brand new vision
"The new platform will represent a paradigm-shift in the space of social and web 4.0"
Learn to speak investorese. It's a MASSIVE help.
lack of desire/motivation
Preach it, brother-man!
All the answers to the meaning of life, purpose of existence, what is a what, and next week's lottery numbers and all I can bring myself to do is shitpost on messageboards.
most likely I will go offline
It will improve your health, that is for sure.
Everyone should go offline from time to time. Helps even out the humours, stabilize the keel, increase the frequency kenneth, and all those other beneficial sorts of things.
I'm going to offline after this post, probably until at least wednesday, on account of I've planned an excursion of rifle-shooting in the desert.
I want to show the whole world that I am the smartest player/person of this mortal human game badly.
How's ol' Resident Biden say? C'mon, man!
If you can figure out human socialisation then sure as the river runs downhill you can figure out human commerce. Hock curios to tourists; peddle shares in your motorcycle club; get yourself on shark tank or whatever that show is.
If I can make over eleven million dollars rewriting old COBOL code then you can get fish out the water. I believe in the you that believes in the me that believes in your bank account.
please support me !
Says the fella with no crypto wallet, paypal link, SWIFT code, or PO box listed. What, you think I'm gonna fax you the money?
Tell you what - you exercise all of your powers, and come find me. I have it on good authority that I've an aura can be spotted at a distance of two hundred twelve miles.
You bring yourself down to my lands, and I'll give you the eight thousand dollars. Here's how I'll do it: I'll give you eight thousand dollars, in person, at any time within the next three sidereal months.
Notice always: the government is fast to crack down on anything that gives people an escape. The conduct of unapproved activites makes upset the activities' approvals department.
Make no mistake, there is nothing "health related" enters into their consideration, else they'd outlaw bungee-jumping and free-diving, the sale of skateboards would carry 40+ year sentences, and any doctor carries out an elective surgery he'd be publically hung.
When a government says "we wanna ban this thing" reliably take it to mean "we can't figure out how to tax this thing"
Because if you don't sign a contract with the moon-men beforehand they'll shoot you out of the sky with their lasers of destruction.
Aww shucks!
lost my sense of humor
I can sympathize. Mine had to be amputated after the yachting accident.
(Whilst behind the scenes, all I'm doing is running off memes on the line printer and stapling them together, real quick like.)
Thanks. I do try to make the posts at least least entertaining even if they don't always make sense - at least in the traditional way.
Sometimes things are difficult to approach with words, because the words (or shapes of the words) can too easily be misleading, and so the best that a man can do is to dance around, waving arms all about, looking for all the world like a kook (and maybe this is why so many of us so-called "conspiracy theorists" end up slandered as madmen) and all in the hope that maybe sometimes people see the patterns between the patterns and you get to have that rare human interaction of mutual understanding.
Alas, far too often the internet provides a... shall we say lower quality of interaction. Which is not at all to imply that I think myself above slinging mud, because I've certainly done that and will almost certainly do so again, but I do try to keep to the realm to returning fire for the most part.
Who knows, these odd forum conversations might even be of use to someone somewhere. Equally likely they disappear into the aether and are never heard from again. But if the wind started its day worried about dying down then it'd never start blowing to begin with, and sailors the world over would be awful disappointed.
THIS star's aligned with THIS and THIS galaxy
I was never good at the old celestial cartography.
Could chart a million courses, but all of them ended at that small planet just north of Betelgeuse.
It's okay though: I'd later win it in a raffle. I'd also later lose it in a game of cards. IT IS WHAT IS WAS (it will be what it is now, tomorrow).
it was taken from me
Get a load of this guy...
HE DOESN'T REMEMBER SIGNING THE FORM!
HE DOESN'T REMEMBER SIGNING THE PAPERWORK!
And then I became eight thousand seven hundred and forty eight (why this number) copies of myself (not clones; but copies), and all of them were laughing. It was very disorenting for some minutes, but then those minutes passed, right off down the drain (down the river). Never will be getting them back, but I will be seeing them again next week.
2/3 Light and 1/3 Darkness
To those following along at home - this fact will in fact depend upon the time of day, prevailing barometric pressure, degrees off the equatorial meridian, the position of polaris in the sky, and what you've been eating lately.
Get about twenty five degrees south, nothing but scorpions for a week, and you'll learn you a thing or two about the balance of the world.
Remember: You are what you eat. So if you spend enough time eating the world, then you're gonna became the world. And sure enough what do we see of the eaters? Expansion!
the ying and yang thing
Now mountaintops, are closer to the sun, which is why despite all the snow and blizzards there's enough power to keep a man warm, as he sits for sixty four straight hours, cross-legged and meditating.
What does he learn?
The literal meaning of "freeze your bollocks off". Clearly, he should've inverted hisself upside down style, would've cooled his head and thawed his nether regions at the same time.
everybody goes home
You go this way.
I'll go...
To the combination pizza hut and taco bell. Where did you think I was going?
(Jokes; I'm actually going to Nando's)
good things
The thing about "good" and "evil" is that at the end of the day when all things have both been done and said, they really only amount to a difference in dress-sense.
I, being no tailor, have no time for clothing debates. I'm just out here trying to feed people. Just one man, with one waffle iron, against all spacetime.
to keep his system going
"Why is he like this?" asked someone once, somewhere, presumably.
Well you see, someone somewhere who may exist, he is a product of the system that made him.
trillions of souls
They'd wanted to get more but the recruiting drive didn't live or measure up to the frankly unrealistic expectations on show that day. Also team the other guys launched a very bold pamphletting campaign at the eleventh hour.
At this point I'd say that if one were to fully know a granary, then you could know anything!
I saw it in grays
To accomplish a similar effect at home: Follow the line of the rising sun as it moves from east to west. Get your face about 3/4" off the ground. Then look at the daytime part with one eye, and the undaytime part with the other.
Free trippy visuals! Cost less than those supposedly-magical mushrooms.
the system perpetuated
The System: Perpetuated would make for a pretty bad ass album title.
got to agree
gotta agree to play, gotta play to win, gotta win to enter "ASS" on the scoreboard again.
(there's also this whole other part where you eat. Man! The part where you eat! Damn! That there's quite some part. Some never get done with it. How's they say, what's them words? "Go on mate, have a giggle?" No I don't think that's it either...)
everybody lines up for miles
If you got the STRONG EYES like that one fella, and likely some manner of vantage point, could probably see 'em.
you just sit on a shelf
Bribe the Officials so as to be put up on the top shelf, next to the grenades. Then, push the grenades off the shelf. Something is almost certainly bound to happen!
a very, very beautiful story
Okay, The Universe, I'm real happy for you and all...
But "he hunted that animals" is the best story of all of time.
Ah... that story. They don't make 'em like that anymore, no. No these days they've got a thousand and one vowels in the script and the plot is always subverting itself. Also there's always that one character - Geoff - Yeah I don't like him.
He's in a chess game
This is, of course, the first mistake.
Chess. Mmmh. Bad news. Can't hide rooks up your sleeves. I've tried.
Look if ever you're absolutely forced to chess (and you can't like, cut your own fingers off on a bandsaw for an excuse) then just follow the advice of reknowned chess legend Vikram Rahul Abishek Pranav Rajesh and play the Tennison Gambit.
I like that they call 'em chessmen though. Like sure one bloke's a castle and another's a literal horse.
the spirits that cling to us
Don't scientologists also go on about this?
wouldn't you want like 100% Light
You ever gone snow blind? Because that's how you go snow blind!
Now, I post this crap to the online messageboard, and... wait for someone to accuse me of being a bundle of sticks, I suppose!
The propagandists aren't sending their best.
Besides, the "people" still using twitter don't need to be "educated", you just sudo update --all-bots new_thought.txt and they'll all have it by tomorrow morning.
I don't have to imagine shit. I already live in Africa!
But remember: In the land of the stupid, the halfwit is a powerful conqueror indeed.
Aviation Engineers: Create magnificent works of art like the Su57, F-14, and the Lightning (that's the original Lightning, by English Electric, not Lockheed's flying tinderbox)
Also Aviation Engineers: Pooped out the F/A-18.
Real talk: I always considered Elong Munt to be a slightly funnier Jeff Bozos.
Mmm. Didn't see the sign I take it? No matter. Legs can be stapled back on...
It's your path
A cobblestone road of my very own! Awesome! It's all that I've ever wanted; except for the other things I've ever wanted.
think about your future self
He has "strong guarantees" from "those in power" that he's going to be a dungbeetle. He'll be fine! Besides, I'd get on no better with him than I did with Past Me. Muturally Exclusive "Me" Effects may occur; bend the spacetime again and we'll have to go get it ironed.
You can be an angry old fart
Wait? I can?
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!
"So what did victory feel like, when it was won?"
Yah it was totally amazing and the best of feelings. I'd do more victories but turns out there's only so many things in this life that a man may legally punch!
you might be a wise sage at peace with yourself
I am! Very much at peace with being utterly livid all the time!
There are no contradictions - I said this before and I will no doubt say it again having forgotten that I've said it before, again. Do raindrops agonize over where to fall? Do bears debate the implication of shitting in the woods? If a tree falls in a complete void with no observers, then what are its formal qualifications for having done so?
could not make your heart hard
Pretty sure it's the calcification of the ventricles what's doing that.
spent your days sharing love, compassion and kindness
What, do you think I grow multiple hectares of crops for personal consumption? What do I look like, some manner of goat or highly convincing goat-analogue? I don't have to have that volume of plants.
to all you met along the way
Sometimes though, you meet people who're most in need of what the wise ancients used to call "a kicking".
Other times, you meet the Buddha - and protocol mandates that you shoot that guy.
you were a shining light
Ever notice how flies tend to circle around lights?
Three flies...
Five flies!
Dangit, we got flies comin' for us!
It's just one of those minefields. Walk around it. Walk around it!
we all realize we are one and the same, we can all move in the same direction towards peace and love.
Pretty certain the humanish thing to do is to move in the opposite direction.
Sure as an active airbreather and pseudopracticing philosophite I am of course overflowing with goodwill and nice vibes towards all of things...
But as a human, I tell you this: I want to get more and more pissed off every day until I die. And I hope that both my life and my death in all ways can spite the people that I dislike, because fuck 'em, they get nothing.
There is, as ever, no contradiction between these things.
A human is a spear-chucking monkey uniquely distinguished amongst all the beasts of the earth and fishes of the sea for its ability to arbitrarily and without basis take up grudges against others of its kind. Who are we; mere internet posters; shipwrecked suvivors on the far shore of the wasteland of modernity, to question this time-tested and divinely ordained manner of things?
Go from being an ass, to being an asshole - become human today!
Big laugh at the yokels in the thread moaning that it's not scientitious.
Setting a newspaper on fire with one's mind is as possible as pulling fish from the river with one's hands.
A woman talking about what's funny or not is like a moose reviewing a hatrack.
Some highlights for me, personally:
"It feels like the oldfags have disappeared and some AIs have taken over."
"Post quality has gone down tremendously. Dank threads are rare."
"It's all astroturfing, shilling, bots, retards, fags, glowies, and trannies."
"There is so much trash here that I think everyone left"
"No one is making memes [like during the election]. No one is doing shit for the lulz."
Much the same seems to be true across the internet. All the forums, chatrooms, newsgroups, bulletin boards, and the like that I follow and/or participate in have experienced similar slowdowns.
Maybe it's a lining up some usual effects - the younger posters age up into life and pick up jobs/wives/debt/etc. and us old farts either go senile and forget the url, or die and are thus spared the responsibility of posting.
But I don't think you're wrong about The Jab having had some effect - there's absolutely no doubt that the "official" casualty numbers were cooked more than a cheap stew (consider: the over-classifying of so-called "covid deaths" during the period deliberately stuffed the books with junk data), and what little disclosure we're going to get will be staged and staggered in such a way that those in power feel it will adequately moderate the displeasure.
Overall "the internet" as a platform for communication is in a fairly sad shape. Almost all the effort expended on it over the past three decades has been to improve the marketing pipeline, at the expense of all other things.
low IQ
In the naïveté of my youth, I had once entertained the idea that people could, in lieu of boasting about their supposed intelligence, simply behave intelligently.
I know better now, of course.
Yes / No on whether you are using 2 hands on the wheel or wearing a seatbelt.
Man, I can't wait for it to try and deal with six fake rubber hands and a bandolier.
"marvels" is a bit of a stretch.
I feel "phenomena" is more accurate.
But you're bang on with the other part. First step to "control" is the monopolization of power, and we're dealing with the sorts of people who think semi-automatic hole-punches are frightfully mighty things. They surely must lose much sleep worrying about the vast power of the unrestrained spirit.
I once dreamt that I was a butterfly.
Well technically, it was more of being... what're they called... one of those worms. Caterpillar Tractor Trailer. One of those. Of course, I was fixing to pupate and all that experimental jazz music. Probably would'a come out one of those really hairy moths.
But I would'a been a hairy moth who'd dreamt that he was a butterfly.
And that's all that matters. Or it doesn't matter at all. Same thing really.
this sack of melted candles
HA. Gottem.
I have a more legitimate claim to the throne
Well your Majesty, I'll have one of my Ambassador's Assistant's Butler's Slaves get in touch with one of your Ambassador's Underlings' Servants' Dogsbodies and we'll set up a war.
When we win, and win we most assuredly will - as the sons of albion have grown fat and lazy - we can have the sack of melted candles in question yote from the castle, maybe with a trebuchet or something.
But I will want to take possession of the Isle of Man. Just letting you know.
Perfectly highlighting the problem with debate-school cuntery: you people can never speak without trying to put words in the other guy's mouth.
Just go drown, you fucking waste of skin.
Day ten thousand, eight hundred, and sixty three...
Got messaged again today.
Graham crackers for supper again.
Down to our last few jpegs.
War is hell.