I know how you feel. Take all that, add a work injury (or even a vax injury, or a war injury) and getting fucked over on top of all that.
When my blood pressure was hitting 200/160 night after night. It wasnt living. I literally was ready to jump off a bridge if I couldnt get relief.
Im a tough guy, but chronic pain is my weakness. Im good 99% of the time but there is always that 1%, usually in the deep dark of the night when I run out of energy/hope and I feel like its never going to end.
Had they not given me beta blockers, after 7 fucking months. I likely would have lit myself on fire or something. Not because I want to die, but because I want my life to mean something.
If I thought lighting myself on fire in front of WCB would make a difference, like preventing what they did to me, to anyone else. I would do it. But I know it wont. No one would give a shit. WCB would just claim mental illness, and thats that.
As if people are mentally ill because they know society is broke. We used to call these people, aware and give them opportunity's to improve themselves and the world around them. Doesnt work like that anymore, hasnt for a long time. All it matters is $$$, thats ALL. Give them pills and if they kill themselves, just pretend like nothing happened. Meanwhile over half the population is taking some kind of anti anxiety medication.
Anyway, one of the best pieces of advice that I heard about suicide and its always stuck with me.
It really is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
If your that unhappy with your life, go join greenpeace or something. That was my plan when I was still young and had energy.
Now Im just waiting around to die. Feel like death is not far for me, and I have a eerily accurate prediction about these kinds of things.
My low phosphorous or maybe something more but my nails are fucked, brittle, discolored, im nauseous everyday, my neck is sore for a year now. No energy and Im lucky if I can sleep through the night.
Went to the walk in today, to try and get my parathyroid results from 6 fucking months ago.
Everytime I go in, they dont have a doctor. Walkin in the middle of the biggest city on canadas east coast.
Aint got fucking doctors.
Dont give up, I know its hard but suicide is harder on the people who love you, dont put them through that.
I know how you feel. Take all that, add a work injury (or even a vax injury, or a war injury) and getting fucked over on top of all that.
When my blood pressure was hitting 200/160 night after night. It wasnt living. I literally was ready to jump off a bridge if I couldnt get relief.
Im a tough guy, but chronic pain is my weakness. Im good 99% of the time but there is always that 1%, usually in the deep dark of the night when I run out of energy/hope and I feel like its never going to end.
Had they not given me beta blockers, after 7 fucking months. I likely would have lit myself on fire or something. Not because I want to die, but because I want my life to mean something.
If I thought lighting myself on fire in front of WCB would make a difference, like preventing what they did to me, to anyone else. I would do it. But I know it wont. No one would give a shit. WCB would just claim mental illness, and thats that.
As if people are mentally ill because they know society is broke. We used to call these people, aware and give them opportunity's to improve themselves and the world around them. Doesnt work like that anymore, hasnt for a long time. All it matters is $$$, thats ALL. Give them pills and if they kill themselves, just pretend like nothing happened. Meanwhile over half the population is taking some kind of anti anxiety medication.
Anyway, one of the best pieces of advice that I heard about suicide and its always stuck with me.
It really is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
If your that unhappy with your life, go join greenpeace or something. That was my plan when I was still young and had energy.
Now Im just waiting around to die. Feel like death is not far for me, and I have a eerily accurate prediction about these kinds of things.
My low phosphorous or maybe something more but my nails are fucked, brittle, discolored, im nauseous everyday, my neck is sore for a year now. No energy and Im lucky if I can sleep through the night.
Went to the walk in today, to try and get my parathyroid results from 6 fucking months ago.
Everytime I go in, they dont have a doctor. Walkin in the middle of the biggest city on canadas east coast.
Aint got fucking doctors.
Dont give up, I know its hard but suicide is harder on the people who love you, dont put them through that.
Ok if you have aids, you still have value. There are lots of bug chasers who would love to have your company. Their is a community waiting for you.
Also, you can find testosterone from your doctor or whatever the laws are and it will make you feel better.