I know it's not much of a conspiracy rather a belief. But for theoretical argument and the conspiracy. Is it possible to be stuck in limbo. Inside Elysium, within Purgatory. How would you escape it? How could you. Suggesting you died, but you're still alive, only you're still inside of the illusion, limbo. Dying again would just drop down into another level of hell, but whatever you're stuck in still isn't right. What breaks out of it? What escapes it?
Purgatory the first gate of hell, stuck in the plain of living and death. The theory was any souls are trapped, trapped in their memories, inside of limbo. Haunting spectating reminiscing for enternity because their sin was often minor of something like suicide. Purgatory was supposed to be a filter for hell, worse there's always worse, depending on their sins in life, descending down into the depths of hell.
Somebody else would have to free them? Or they'd have to make ammends to the memories haunting them.
Not in this matrix. The machines have won. What breaks out of purgatory.
The point represents the want for an end; which for life implies death. The parasitic few suggest progressivism to tempt the many forwards with the flow; while ignoring to resist for the sustenance of form. You are being tricked to want to solve conflicts; which ignores the status quo of struggling to grow within liquidity; within the solution. Life is about the momentum of living; not towards the point of death; yet others can point towards (suggestion) anything you want (hope) or not want (fear).
Right there "current" aka moving; being moved; in response to being enacted upon; form within flow, and it's not ours; we exist within it as choice at the center of balance (momentum of motion). You are tricked to ignore this for the narration (suggested narrative for action) by others; who sell you the consequences of ignorance as collapsing civilizations; wrecked nations; wars; cultural clashes; economic struggles; historical revisionism...as men made changes in the process of betterment; while battling a failing ecosystem and just not living up to demanded standards.
This all represents deception away from a balance based system; from those within having finite access (choice) to an infinite offer (balance) from a system that inspires resistance from those within.
That represents fear towards outcome; based on consent to suggested "hell". One cannot perceive hell; but one can view everything perceivable through the lens of suggested "hell".
Perceived sound alarms those within through inspiration for self sustenance; while the suggested outcry of alarms tempts one to fear what's coming.
a) impressing flow (loss) sets expressing form (growth). It's the choice of form that shapes the incoming into disasters.
b) DISASTER, noun [Greek, a star.] Oh vey...
a) matter (form) proceeds from inception towards death (flow). The foundation of "how" represents motion.
b) what about those who grow while you perceive limbo all around you? What if it's a state of mind? The incoming disasters you fear...do any other life-forms within your habitat share that fear?
They just had to subvert her death by flaunting her tits around...
When you are all excited to delve into the Divine Comedy; just to be kicked to the curb by its poem form..until you realize DANTE (Latin durante; durare) - "to harden, endure". Well played.
Suggested through news (north; east; west; south coverage) aka temptation from every direction to imbalance the center of balance (choice). And it's the current (motion) that causes the balance (momentum); not the suggested narratives by other form.
You were shown the ignorance of the majority around you. Their self destruction is exploited; directed; encouraged and maintained. If you perceive that; then you can choose to resist the temptations they are falling for and the choice they all make...want (suggested) over need (perceived). Nobody can make that choice for them; and nobody but oneself has the authority of choice. They can only suggest choices (want) which tempts to ignore being the choice (need) aka the response-ability at the center of balance.
You require the self discernment about being growth (form) within loss (flow) to be efficient at adaptation. Self discernment has to be grown by choice; it cannot be shared through suggested choices.
Because "it" represents circumstantial change within the ever changing moment. You need to respond as the center (choice) to the moment (balance); while sharing the consequences of all others choices. You grow outwards; yet are tempted to leave your position for whatever shit others want you to fix. If you resonate with balance; then it doesn't matter where your habitation is; because you will grow within any circumstance.
One can utilize everything to sustain oneself...it's the suggested "it" that tempts away from the self (that tempts you and your friends to fight "it" in the sewers aka from light into darkness aka from comprehension into ignorance aka exit light; enter night).
Notice that the circular roller-coaster that tempts you; becomes quickly boring the more you engage with it...that represents the uroboros allegory. Every temptation eats itself, and you choose to be the self within (want vs not want) temptation.
A missed opportunity representing itself by trying to align as many ingredients as momentarily perceived. This could've been triggered by a smell; by the scenery; a sound etc. This will sporadically continue until you worked through what initially tempted you to ignore the opportunity. The consciousness is trying to serve you the opportunity again; yet your memories are tempting you to hold onto all the details; which causes you to relive (more or less distorted) aspects of it.
The only thing one can try to escape from...response-ability (choice), yet that attempted escape represents the choice to ignore (want) the choice to respond (need). It's hilarious when one comprehends this internal struggle; because then all the external blame becomes the emperor (of justification) without clothes (nothing to hide naked ignorance).
Form within flow aka choice within balance represents inequality within equality aka differences within same. Chance (effect of an unknown cause) is being suggested to tempt ignorance of being effect (form) within cause (flow) aka choice within perceived balance (need/want); which one then ignores for suggested imbalance (want versus not want), and the versus is then suggested as the "odds". This is why the many are reasoning about the chance of odds; while the few run the bank (river-bank aka natural opposites aka balance) that always wins.
You as the ONE represent profit (growth) within loss; yet the suggested term PROF'IT, noun (Latin profectus, proficio) - "to proceed forward" tempts one to ignore being the temporary resistance within the ongoing velocity that processes one forwards.
The few suggest profit so that the many proceed within loss; instead of growing resistance by resisting as choice aka the highest value...evaluation.
Because trauma (force of ongoing velocity) dominates temporary resistance. All the suggested information you collected can be transmuted right back to source (ongoing inspiration) by mimicry of velocity. The primary function of memory (mind) is adaptation to perceived inspiration (need), while the secondary function represents the temptation to accumulate suggested information (want). After trauma the need to be able to perceive input reestablishes first; which ever so often cleans the memory of accumulated wants. This also represents the function of a corrupted sense causing the re-balance of others senses.
In short...if trauma causes an imbalance for form; then the balance of flow will level form right back...minus the damages.
EMO'TION, noun [Latin emotio; emoveo, to move from.]; which tempts to ignore being moved by.
Ask yourself what did she saw in you that drove her away? Try making amends for that; not for her; but for the sustenance of self. Your accident and her moving away represent the accumulation of consequences from your former choices and you're still letting that corruption grow. Find the root; resist nourishing it, and the growth will die out, leaving just a little scar.
Back then you were a consenting participant; following along the suggested "world" of others. Trauma kept you from following; now you perceive the self destructive path the suggested world is on; yet still lack comprehension about yourself. You should be surrounded by growth that you set into the real world, ad the fruits of your labors should be inspiration for the responsibility of your choice. Instead your memories are still somewhat attached to a world that never was yours; that was; is and will be shaped by others to the detriment of all following along.
Every seed you plant shows you different change; every moving difference you perceive represents inspiration for you to adapt to. Living represents the temporary existence within constant change; within the ever changing moment(um) of motion. You are lacking comprehension about perceived change; because you choose to ignore growing it. At any moment you can choose to change that.
AGE, noun [Latin aetas, or aevum.] - "the whole duration of a being". You can only perceive the moment (fraction of the whole); so why are you contemplating the whole? The parasitic few suggest clocks; calendars; dates and counting to deceive the many from adapting to the moment.
Good vs bad represents the rebranding of want vs not want reasoning (imbalance); which ignores (limbo) ones placement as choice at the center of need/want (balance). If you are concerned about good vs bad; than you chose want (suggested) over need (perceived) beforehand; hence operating in ignorance; which causes lack of comprehending perceived.
Instead of looking for the background (backstage) of the staged narrative suggested; question the foundation of suggestion aka choice (consent) to choice (suggestion) contract law. The parasitic few suggest "actors"; while the many ignore that all those actors a reacting to directors. See, direction (flow aka inception towards death) represents the action for the reacting form (life). It's being shown to us everywhere; but we are tempted to ignore the perceived obvious for what's going on up on the suggested stage.
Matter (form) expresses Immaterial (flow). Keep expressing; yet question impression (perception) to compression (comprehension) beforehand.
No I am not going there. It's nothing to do with me.
But she aborted 2 babies. Does that answer it Freud. She hated me when I took to the clinic and held her hand. Took her to this baby execution chamber. Waited there with her, held her, helped her. It made me sick, but for her. The irony I think was she cannot even be inseminated after. She got scooped out. Irregularities after. Possibly lost that chance altogether. Or maybe she was able too. I never found out. But the bitch hated me for getting her pregnant. Even though it was her own fault. I made sure she had pills. Took her to the clinic to get them every time. Asked her if she took them. The first we were young, dunno if she forgot, we were away somewhere but she had them I made sure. Second time she took meds that cancelled the pill. What are those odds. Both times it was her choice. Last time it was dangerous for her, she was warned of the risk, but she was reaching a point where law wouldn't allow it. Like at the last few days, for an emergency. She played with me yes, no, shit no, yes, no shit. Then she used it against me, causing me to be all of her blame. I supported her no matter what. I tried and beg her to keep. But she was a bitch. Not worth it. Although made me do something reckless that night. I cannot remember it. Only 30 minutes of party where I was a mess. Like laughing the police had to get my shit from her, she was trying to steal from me, when she called them on me. I wasn't anything except that's mine, but it was at her parent's. No, she's keeping it. Police it's his. Angry that she was a bitch, but she was my world at the time. I would have moved Heaven and Earth. Woke up in hospital.
The rest of your speal is irrelevant. Why did it affect me. Wouldn't it anybody else. If that memory was that strong. The only time after hundreds since. Hundreds since. Why that one. Why. Tonne of bricks. Like a car crash. Crushing. It wasn't then, what would you do. It isn't. It was delightful. But the mind plays tricks. Back of the mind how, no, please, yes it's somebody else. Hang on. Why am I remembering them. It wasn't her fault. It's mine. But that loss was something else.
Back too the topic. It wasn't about me. I used a comparison into this other World we find ourselves in. While trying to draw a conspiracy. It's that blacksun shit. Or it's that ancient hellgate. We are inverted into an Internet where this World is reigning in its darkness. There are only cunts and tyrants. They away from our choices are often making it worse. Until are freedoms are dying. I wanted to know more about it. Was all. You pressed me into why I made the topic. Perhaps I was also questioning something in my own life as well.
Although your methods and means haven't helped. But no offense. However if you think there's still some inspiration to where this future goes, it's often because you're still profiting, instead of actually realising it. Look at it. Tell me I am wrong. I am not. There's a fading light today where humanity stops. It has been a roller coaster this past decade. Years of going downhill. Tell me those odds it shoots back up. No Dr. Unicorn. Fresh outta tracks and those breaks are failing.
Nothing represents suggested; everything represents perceived, and the choice between perceived (need) and suggested (want) exists within the center of everything. Everything does you...you respond to being done by everything.
Shirking of responsibility. It's your choice to resist that temptation; no matter who you blame for what.
a) sigismund schlomo freud
b) the foundation of choice (balance) represents the solution to every answer (want) and question (outcome).
Here we have shirking of responsibility causing the loss of the perpetuated shared self (offspring). All a chain of consequences from ignorant choices made way before. The use of contraception (which the parasitic few suggested to you) implies your choice of lust (want) over propagation of self (need). She had no part in that choice; she was the temptation for your lust; which you fell for.
All the drama; all the blaming; all the justifications; all the loss originates in that choice of want over need; but for yourself you need to dig even deeper...why the lust; why the drugs; why suggesting harm through contraceptives (to stand against conception); why the lack of balance within the relationship; why defending self by blaming a 3rd party; why still getting tempted by emotions after all this time?
You are the one holding onto all these vivid details; which you layer as a defense upon your own choices. She's not there to blame, and you even had yet another woman trigger all these suppressed memories. You have to uproot these memories to be able to sustain self. You didn't even work through the loss; but buried it like so many others do; which will continue to bite you in the ass; because you choose to allow corruption to fester within your memory and the moving system is growing it unless you resist; which ties right back into the "irrelevant speal" I write about.
Because all represents one in energy. You represent the consequence (effect) of a moving system (cause). The foundation for "why" represents self sustenance.
How many around you are affected by your lack of growth?
The strength represents the incoming motion (velocity) which grows the seed of suggested information that you put into your memory. If you instead adapt to incoming (inspiration) you would grow resistance to it; which represents your strength as form (resistance) within flow (velocity).
Your choice restricts the mind to the suggested information by others; which in return tricks you to ignore the perceived inspiration. TRICK, noun (Latin intrico) - "to fold" represents the inversion of to unfold aka to grow comprehension of perceived.
RE (response by choice) to MEMORY (mind). You are falling for the temptation of your ego (a mind filled with suggested information).
Haha. You have given me a laugh. A huge laugh if nothing else. Hats off to you for the humour.
She was perfect in every single way a young man could desire. It wasn't lust. It was love. Undying. Eternal. Hated but loved. Loved but hated. However not meant to be. Not meant to be. Much better off without it. Too much blame and not enough unity. Because you can only love as much as another does you. If they don't for whatever their reasons there is only blame, and lust, and an ignorant need. That's why there's often no love, meaninglessly it's an infatuation becoming another emotion, a belonging desire to use and be fullfilled. A word used when it wants. It wants what nobody else can give. Or it finds happiness when it needs.
You cannot uproot memory, it forever haunts. It reminisces. It plays itself over and over when you dream. You can block memories, until they remember everything they've forgot.
The only memory I cannot remember is that night, that incident. What exactly happened in that crash. Wiped out blind. Erased. I have tried under hypnosis.
My memories go as far back as 1 years old, they shouldn't but they do. Hazey, blurred, but specifics, as far back as a toddler taking its first steps. Almost every occurrence since 6 years old with crystal clear clarity apart from a few minor details such as names of associations, and the exact date of their occurence, or the street address, and what I ate for dinner. But dreamily times of emotion like anger, or joy. For example the horses on the farm, before 3 years old wanting to pet, feed, and ride. I can see them now that memory and others then. Like crying loudly as a baby in my cot. At 3 years old we moved to another country. I can remember it. Events in it. First time I touch a computer, at 3. An earthquake. My best friend then. Etc.